It is 3:53 am, and this is my second post of the morning: Iann is awake. After about 2 weeks of sleeping all night, he is up this morning. He woke up at around 2:30am, same time as always. After lying in bed for ten minutes, I got up, grabbed the computer and came upstairs.
As I was walking up, our dog ran to the back door. A little odd, but oh well. He may have been attempting to escape my wrath at the present he left me on the couch. In the 3 years we've had him I believe this is the first time he has even had an accident in the house, let alone on my couch!!!! Isn't changing dirty diapers enough?
I didn't hear Iann at all as I cleaned up the mess and put the dog in his crate, so I returned to bed. Just as I was about to drift off I heard Iann doing what Jon and I call 'crib gymnastics.' (We came up with this phrase over a year ago, so Iann has obviously had sleeping issues for a while now!) 'Crib gymnastics' involves Iann banging about in his crib, with little to no crying involved. So, I turned on the humidifier in our room to block out the noise for sleeping hubby, and came back up. Iann got a dose of Benedryl a little while ago and I am waiting for it to take effect, for him to go back to sleep. While I sit out in the living room listening to him, I figured I may as well move forward with my Alex project.
I have so very many pictures of him, all stored on my hard drive, backed up on disks. But what good are they doing there? I don't ever look at them; I don't think anyone does. The goal for my posts on Alex is to print them all, binding them into a book. That way I won't feel like he is living on only in my computer.
Adjusting to life with two kids was hard for me, there are so many things I feel like I did wrong. I worried about how much TV Brynn was watching. I found myself yelling at Brynn as we were getting ready to go somewhere, because Alex would be crying in his car seat. Bedtime was a nightmare: Jon worked swing shift, 2:45 - 11pm, so I was doing it alone. It seemed like whenever I worked out which one to put to bed first, something changed and Alex would end up crying while I was reading Brynn a book, or screaming in his crib.
We had some great times though. Alex was sent home from the NICU with a clean bill of health. It was predicted that he would make a full recovery and grow to be just like any other little boy. I am so grateful for this because I don't feel like I wasted any of our short time with him worrying about the future. Not knowing what was to come allowed us to enjoy him while we could.
Here are some memories from our first month together:
The name of the restaurant in Ridgeway where we were eating escapes me at this time of day (4:30am, Iann still moaning), however mum had something in her purse to amuse Brynn. He wanted them fashioned into glasses, wearing them with his cape for the rest of the meal.
Jon's parents came out to visit us in late August. His mum had met Alex at the hospital, however it was the first time his dad had had the pleasure. Their hotel had a pool so we spent some time there, as well as fishing and general lounging around in our front garden.
I feel like I have been given a second chance at mothering two boys with Iann now. Things certainly aren't perfect around here, but I do try to keep my frustration at life with two kids in check, not taking it out on Brynn. He riles me up enough on his own, he doesn't deserve to be my scapegoat.
On that note, I am heading back to bed. Iann is still moaning every once in a while, so I guess Benedryl has lost it's power over him. Sigh. Or maybe he spat too much out when I was wrestling it into him. I need to be up in 2 hrs, and having lost 2 hours of sleep this morning it may be a rough day. One where I will fight to keep 'crazy mama' dormant!
I feel mostly for Jon, although he has slept through this: I work today and he watches Iann, taking him to a gymnastics class. It's hard enough getting Iann to do what Coach is asking of the class on a normal day, and near impossible when he's tired from being up for so long.
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